One of the things I want most for my kids is to eventually find work that they love and are passionate about. Norah is insistent that she’ll be a runner, an artist, and a stay-at-home mom with a doctor-husband, but I’m trying to convince her that she might want a back-up plan in case the doctor runs off with the nanny.

Once I commented to a friend that I love my job, and she gave me a funny look and an emphatic, “Really?!” Most people don’t know exactly what I do, and I’ve given up trying to explain it. It’s something to do with doors and locks and building codes, so I guess it’s understandable that my friend would have a hard time feeling my passion.

When we started thinking about spending an extended period of time out of the country, the first thing I did was ask for my boss’ blessing. He supported the plan right away, knowing that it would make me a happier and healthier employee. I have worked for the same company for 20 years, through several corporate reorganizations and name changes. But the brands and people have stayed constant (for the most part), and I’m probably a “lifer” at this point.

I created my current job over a period of 15 years, first learning about code requirements for doors (there are way more than you’d think!), then conducting training and answering questions, putting together a reference guide, and eventually starting a blog (www.iDigHardware.com) and writing articles. Over those years I made thousands of connections – with my coworkers, door hardware suppliers, fire marshals and building inspectors, security consultants and integrators, locksmiths, architects, contractors, facility managers…basically anyone who had a question about doors and found their way to me (thank you Google).

A few years ago, my unofficial night job of global code consultant extraordinaire surpassed my day job of specification department manager. I scheduled a meeting with HR, brought in examples of my code-related work, and asked that a new position be created where I could do this work full-time. After HR consulted with our leadership team, I had a new job! I so appreciate them making this investment, when I’m pretty sure some of them are still wondering what it is that I do, and why.

My charge is to provide education and support regarding code requirements for door openings. If you’re not one of those people listed in my connections above, you’re probably wondering, “How complicated can it be?? A door is a door!” So here’s an example. A new school is being designed by an architect, and the door hardware is specified by a door hardware consultant. That consultant decides what hinges, lock or panic hardware, door closer or automatic operator, gasketing and threshold, door stop, kick plate, etc., will go on that door. There are hundreds of products to choose from, based on function, design, durability, price, brand, access control, and other factors. And institutional doors and hardware are EXPENSIVE…one mistake could easily cost hundreds or thousands of dollars.

Add to the mix the code requirements for egress, fire protection, and accessibility. The consultant needs to choose hardware that meets all of the previously-listed requirements, but is also code-compliant. Doors serving big groups of people may require panic hardware. Fire doors need hardware that will ensure that they’re closed and latched during a fire. And the Americans With Disabilities Act mandates accessibility for all. When the consultant runs across an application they’re not sure about, they can come to me for help.

I love helping people – it sounds cliché, but it’s true. And the people that are coming to me for help don’t have a lot of options for finding their answers…if they didn’t have me as a resource they would either spend hours researching the codes or wing it and hope for the best. Their ability to easily find the right answer and raise their level of knowledge about the codes helps to ensure the safety of building occupants. Yes it’s a niche, but it’s my niche.

About a month ago, a hardware distributor sent me an email that read, “You work so very hard for our industry and for the safety of building occupants.  You are saving lives every bit as much as a firefighter.  The good news is we’ll probably never even know how many or which crisis was averted or how much impact you have had.  Suffice it to say that I’m so proud to have you in our industry and to count you as a friend.  You’re my ‘Shero.’“ The same week, I got an email from our company president that said, “FYI…really proud of the work you are doing!” And a couple of weeks ago I received a selfie from one of my readers, taken with the CEO of our company at a trade show. My reader texted, “I told him how much I appreciate you and the work you do. No joke. He was speaking with me about products and sales reps. He was very happy to hear about iDigHardware. I told him that I tell all of my customers in 42 counties from educational to manufacturing to visit and sign up for your daily email. You’re a value that has no limitations of knowledge or where to find it. 🙂”

Who wouldn’t love a job that brought that kind of validation on a regular basis? Stay tuned for Part 2…

My father died on April 16th – just a couple of weeks ago. He was diagnosed with cancer in February, and he did not think the disease would take him so quickly. The last time I talked to him, when he was in the VA hospital with a broken hip (because of the cancer in his bones), one of his most emotional moments was when he expressed his desperation for “more time.”

I didn’t want to upset him further so I didn’t ask, but I wondered what he would do with the time if he got his wish. It made me think a lot about the instinctive and insatiable desire of most humans for more time. How much time is enough? 70, 80, 90 years? My grandmother, who I adored, was just short of 96 when she died. She lived in her own home and seemed content, but I think the time came when the aches and pains and “senior moments” made her say, “Enough already!” She passed on some of her possessions that she knew we would treasure. Her affairs were in order. She wasn’t wishing for more time as her clock wound down.

My father was 68 when he died, so maybe sometime between 70 and 90 or more likely 80 and 90 is when most people reach the point where they feel like they’ve had enough time. Or maybe it’s never enough. The priest who spoke at my father’s wake and funeral advised both times that we consider whether we would be ready when our time came. I’m obviously not ready now…I have 3 kids to finish raising and lots of good work to do. And even when my family is all grown up I’ll have responsibilities to take care of and things to look forward to – maybe travel or a good book or a nice bottle of wine or even grandkids.

I hope I never reach the point where I don’t want more time, when there’s nothing left to enjoy or the bad outweighs the good. But when my time does come I hope to be able to look back at my life with few regrets…to know that I did everything I wanted to do, that I was present (physically, mentally, AND emotionally) for the important moments, and that I squeezed all of the life out of my days. I don’t want to wish desperately for more time.

A few years ago I was talking to one of the kindergarten teachers at school, complaining that I was so busy and overscheduled that I couldn’t enjoy anything because I was always stressed about the other things that needed to be done or where I was supposed to be next. The teacher described it as “skimming the surface,” and we agreed that a lot of us are currently living in this mode – just flying through at top speed and dipping down to skim the surface and engage once in a while. I’m overwhelmed… with a job that I love but that never ends, with our crazy schedules, with the STUFF that surrounds us. It’s all too much.

My main motivation for our upcoming adventure in Mexico is the fear of regret. If we didn’t go because it was too difficult to get the house in order, or I wasn’t sure if we had enough money saved, or I didn’t get my rear in gear, I’d never forgive myself. When I look at the to-do list I wonder how it’s all going to get done considering the number of little things that are pushed from one week’s list to the next because there’s no time, but I am committed. My family needs this hiatus from the harried schedule we’ve been living with for the last 10 years. We need to stop and smell the jacarandas along the way.  🙂

Some of you already know that we are preparing for an adventure, but I need to catch everyone else up so bear with me. This summer we will head south of the border, to spend a year in San Miguel de Allende, Mexico. Just typing those words gives me heart palpitations…partly from excitement, but also a bit of panic because there is so much left to do before we go. AAAAAHHHH!!! I just received my flexible work agreement signed by me, my boss, and HR, so it’s all systems go!

We’ve been talking about this idea since we came back from our month-long trip to SMA in the summer of 2013. I loved the city so much that I made Ben promise we’d move there when he retires (5 years before me but not for 10+ years). As I thought more about it I realized that I really want to share that experience with the kids, and now is the time.

When I first mentioned the possibility of relocating for a year, Norah was ready to start packing immediately. That’s not a surprise, as she is probably the most adventurous of the 3 kids. She will be in 4^th grade in SMA and will come back to 5^th grade in her current elementary school. I’m excited that she’ll be able to spend that special 5th-grade year as a BWOC (Big Woman On Campus) in the school that we’ve loved for the last 8 years.

Adlani wasn’t completely opposed to the plan, as long as he could take along his electronic devices (technology overload will likely be the topic of another post). He will be in 6^th grade in Mexico, and because he is one of the youngest kids in his grade we’ve decided to have him start middle school (6^th grade again) when we return. He’s not overly thrilled about that, but he’ll thank me someday.

Aliya had just started middle school when I first brought up the idea, and she was not a fan of the plan. In fact, she cried whenever I mentioned it. I explained why I thought it would be such an amazing experience, but she was insistent that she didn’t want to miss a second of middle school. I figured she’d get past that and she has…at this point she’s actually excited about going, although she will miss her friends (as we all will!). She will be in 8^th grade in Mexico, and will come back and start high school.

Some of you may be wondering WTF would ever make us want to move to Mexico…they burn cars there and kidnap people! What about our house, pets, church, friends, etc.? I will write more about all of those in future posts, but I will address the safety aspect now. It’s true that certain parts of Mexico are unsafe, due mostly to the drug cartels. Last Friday there were blockades in various parts of the country in retaliation for the government’s crack-down on these criminals. We will be watching the situation closely, and if we need to change our plans, we will.

Many areas of Mexico are safe and wonderful, despite the picture painted by the media. We have friends there who will give us the real scoop and I belong to several online groups of ex-pats – we can decide over the coming months if we should reconsider. But I’m not going to let the fear of what could happen be the driving factor in my life. Bad things can happen anywhere, and while civil unrest in the ‘Ham is pretty unlikely, I’m not going to hide in my comfort zone and miss out on what the world has to offer.

I used to write on this blog almost every day, and it really helps me to look at things in a different light and work through difficulties. While I write mostly for myself, my family, and my close friends, there are others who have said they want to follow along on this journey so I will post the link on Facebook when I write a new post.

I leave you with this poem, sent to me a year ago by my friend Elizabeth…

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