When Adlani grows up he’s going to spend a lot of time on the psychiatrist’s couch talking about how his mother outed him on her blog with all kinds of embarrassing posts. I can’t help it though…he’s in a blogworthy phase right now.
After the initial pressure of getting Adlani close enough to potty-trained to start preschool, I’ve made several attempts to teach him how to wipe his own butt but I haven’t stressed out over it. The teachers don’t wipe his butt and he has to do it himself at school, so I figure if he’s asking me to do it at home it’s out of laziness. He doesn’t bother to ask me any more, but if Ben’s within earshot he’ll call him for help.
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The other night I was sitting in Norah’s room and I had a clear view of Adlani on the toilet. (At least he was on the toilet and not doing his business at my desk.) Mission accomplished, he stood up, stuffed a big wad of toilet paper between his butt cheeks and stood there for about 10 seconds (a long time for him to stand still). I couldn’t tell if there was any clenching going on but there was no visible wiggling. Then he bent over a little until the wad popped out and landed on the floor. Done!
In my opinion, that was more of a “blot” than a “wipe”, but I’m pretty sure Ben’s in charge of teaching Adlani about male hygiene, so as long as I’ve got OxiClean stain remover they’re on their own.
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And then there’s Norah, who laid down beside me on the bed last weekend.
Norah: “Hey Mom! I’ve got a hole in my private area!”
Me: “I know. It’s supposed to be there. Don’t put anything in it.”
(because she would)
Norah: “Why?”
Me: “Because your poop needs to come out.”
Norah: “Nooo…the poop comes out back here.”
Me: “Well, your pee needs to come out.”
Norah: “Oh. Ok.”
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I should post this photo as a little contest to see if anyone can guess what the heck you’re looking at. You should be able to tell by the spider veins and orange-peel texture that it’s my thigh, and I’ll give you a hint. It’s the reason I’m not getting my 5 hours of good sleep per night.
