Elaine Kessler

The BLOCKS PTO sponsored a really fun event tonight at Adlani’s preschool. The kids dressed in their pj’s and Elaine Kessler performed. She is SO CREATIVE! Her show was a winter theme and she sang songs about snow boots, penguins, snowmen, snowflakes, etc. The kids were hysterical over the bird puppet in the penguin song. She showed them how to skate using paper plates on their feet, and had a snowstorm and snowball fight with cotton balls. It was a great show and everyone was all tired out by the time she got to the goodbye song. On their way out, the kids were able to swap one of their old boring books for a new exciting one. They loved it…Norah is so ready to go to preschool.







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Channel 4 News

When I went to school to pick up Aliya this afternoon, I noticed a news crew approaching people in the parking lot. Joe Shortsleeve appeared outside of my car window and stuck a microphone in my face. Just in case I end up on the cutting room floor, here’s the transcript of my lengthy and eloquent interview…
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Joe: Do you have a child that goes to this school?
Me: Yes
Joe: We’re here investigating a rodent problem in the school cafeteria. Are you aware of this?
Me: No
Joe: The problem is ongoing. We saw rodent droppings in the cafeteria today. What do you think about this? (making disgusted face)
Me: Well, it’s kinda gross.
Joe: Do you think the school should have informed parents? (making incredulous face)
Me: I trust the school to make good decisions, but yeah, I guess I’d like to know.
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The end. Probably not what he was looking for. Actually, I’m totally aware of the mice, because when the governor came for a tour, everyone was worried that there would be a mouse sighting during his visit. I thought it would be fabulous for the governor to see a mouse, because maybe then we’d get the money to hire an exterminator. Last May when I helped with the teacher appreciation lunch we were told to watch out for mice in the teachers’ lounge. The kids aren’t allowed to leave food in their lockers and I saw a few traps right before the governor’s visit. Oh well…a few mouse droppings never killed anyone.
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Breathe In…Breathe Out

Yesterday I received some advice about motherhood that I’ve heard umpteen times before…”Enjoy every moment. It’s gone before you can believe it.” I try. I really do. But some moments just cannot be enjoyed without medication.

Snow days should not come in pairs. That should be a rule. We are in the middle of Snow Day #2, and even though I worked until 2 a.m. this morning, I still have things I need to do. While I was talking to one of my coworkers on the phone, I heard Aliya and Norah having way too much fun with their birthday crown painting project and wandered into the dining room in time to see them slathering paint on themselves like it was Oil of Olay. I remained calm until I hung up the phone, and then I turned into a raging beast. There were blobs of paint on the rug, the furniture, and somehow I’m finding it in other areas of the house. I just found a big blob on one of the new leather chairs and a smear on the kitchen floor.

I’m sure some day I’ll look back on this and laugh, as long as I survive my own rage without having an aneurysm.


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Family Resemblance

This photo of me at the age of 7 arrived in the mail today from my stepmother, Susie (Jeff’s mother if you’re keeping score). It’s pretty amazing how much the kids resemble me, since I’m a mongrel and Ben is 100% purebred Moroccan. I think Aliya wins the look-alike prize, but Adlani also looks A LOT like me and people say that Norah looks like me too. Poor kids. I guess it could be worse for them. When Aliya was a baby, a complete stranger looked at her and said, “Well thank God she didn’t get Daddy’s nose!”
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I Need a Little Something to Take the Edge Off

When I was a kid, and even as a pre-motherhood adult, I always wondered why my mother spent my childhood in a rage. I guess she wasn’t always in a rage but she yelled a lot. Mothers always say, “When you have kids, you’ll understand!” (usually at the top of their lungs with their eyes bulging out of their heads), and it’s absolutely true. Now that I have to get 3 kids out of the house every morning, with all of the required clothing and school supplies, I DO understand.

The thing that’s driving me insane is the fact that I have to repeat myself so many times to make anything happen. I know what you’re thinking…if I followed through on my threats the kids would learn that I mean business. Here’s the thing. I DO follow through, and I know that many of you have been witnesses to me following through. It’s not easy to take away trick-or-treating privileges when all of the other kids are on their way out the door with their bags, but sometimes it has to be done.

To improve the morning routine, I have tried threats and punishments, praise and rewards, bribery, going to bed early, getting up early, giving the kids responsibility, making it a team effort…you name it. I lay out clothes, backpacks, and outerwear, and prepare lunch and snacks the night before. Which is why it makes me insane that I find myself yelling every morning. One morning I counted how many times I had to say, “Put on your shoes/socks/underwear/pants/shirt,” in order to get all 3 kids dressed. 34 TIMES!!! And that didn’t include outerwear!

This morning I heard myself yell, “YOU KNOW WHAT’S GOING TO HAPPEN?! YOU GUYS ARE GOING TO MAKE ME INSANE SO I END UP IN A MENTAL INSTITUTION, AND THEN YOU WON’T HAVE A MOTHER!!” I’m pretty sure I heard that one from Mom in 1976. Thanks Mom.
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